Day 293

Yesterday was kind of flat with no energy or motivation. The seasonal depression and Carol’s death have sucked out forward motion. Karen helped my knee with her magic massage. That was the high point in the day. Julia came and paid her debt. I’m proud of how she has come back from her misadventure and has worked on herself too. Today is CofC and I’ll walk in the wind and rain. Maybe my emotional clouds will clear with the effort. Life goes on.

Day 292

Carol was in ICU with all kinds of measures to help her fight the sepsis but to no avail. She died at 8PM with her children by her bedside. I was there in the morning with her and when the family arrived, I left. Carol has long been my friend and image of creativity and grace. I respected how she lived her life. The sepsis was caused by an undiagnosed UTI. As I am prone to that condition I will be extra attentive.

Day 291

When I took the key for Carol’s house, I knew that I might have to use it in an emergency and that happened last night. Fortunately, Scott came to get it, and open the door for the ambulance people. Carol was on the floor and had been for some time. I won’t know how she is until later. She needs to move to her daughter’s Seattle home for safety although she will fight to stay. She is extremely frail and Angela wants her.

Day 290

The dinner was fun and the thoughtfully personalized gifts were proof of our value to the Chamber of Commerce. My gift was a shopping bag and a gift certificate to Wild Rivers market. Today is board of supervisors meeting and I will stay to the end in case of dramatics again. I will make my time line to Kevin and the rest of the day is open. Walking is somewhat easier. Down to a dull pain and the leg will hold my weight.

Day 289

After church everyone wanted to be close together. Usually two or three people sit at two or three tables. Yesterday we kept adding chairs until everyone was in one place. It was warm and friendly. The same thing happened at the museum meeting. Tables were pushed together and everyone was in one place. Interesting. I like being part of both groups. Later, the CofC volunteer dinner and I’m wondering if it will also have the cozy feeling. I will miss the Dem meeting.

Day 288

Five meals and five naps and yesterday was finally over. Wallow and then climb out of it. Today Linda Lee is leading the service, preaching, and singing a song she wants us to learn. Then a Historical Society general meeting complete with Christmas cookies and ice cream. At least I will be out with people and not sitting with dogs and TV. I will call tomorrow about my knee. It’s been a month and I still can’t walk comfortably. Time for more information.

Day 287

A handful of Christmas tree permits were given and that was it for the visitors’ center duty. Walking is still painful and I’m afraid that it is more than a muscle strain. The persistent pain is in the inside of my knee. Oh lordy, I don’t want knee problems. I’ll see Brad again to check but then maybe an X-ray or MRI. It’s dark and raining and I’m glum. Not enough restful sleep and too much alone time. Seasonal depression may have landed.