Day 126

They didn’t get home because of taking a slow trip with stops for walking. Chuck is not smoking and I’m sure he is miserable. My day was great. From the visitors’ center, I went for a deep massage and from there to a Dem meeting that was pizza and conversation, back home to text and call people to attend the reunite families rally this morning. I’m also recruiting people to walk in the Fourth parade with the Dems. My favorite kind of day.

Day 125

Hollie and Chuck will be home today. I’m looking forward to seeing her. Lots of hugs ready. Megan had a melt down with the realization that she will eventually lose people. I said that my age should be a clue. She said no, not you. Well, yes. After all, just because I’m well and productive now and take good care of myself doesn’t mean I’m indestructible. Putting her on my accounts should have been a clue too. Meanwhile, off to the visitors’ center.

Day 24

The museum was an assembly line for getting the newsletter out with breaks for greeting visitors. Today starts with errands and groceries and goes somewhere new, I hope. I’m restless for a stimulating project or person, or idea. My curiosity antennae keep waving around seeking newness. I’m sure there is something waiting for my attention. Meanwhile, the garden always needs attention. The beans are going up the poles, the peas found the shrimp net, the lemon cucumbers are growing out of their container.

Day 123

Chuck’s surgery went well. All the cancer was removed from his tongue. I hope it improves the way he speaks to others. The BOS was short and businesslike. The two under recall are trying to act like they are good supervisors but I don’t trust either of them. Today is museum duty and I’m looking forward to being there. It’s always interesting. I’m going to reread my old newspaper columns to renew my fluency with historical events to share at the visitors’ center.

Day 122

I had a day alone. There were a few texts and a bit of Facebook but I didn’t talk out loud except to the dogs. It was welcome. Much as I enjoy my chosen activities, a day off from people is necessary. Today is BOS. The agenda doesn’t look full but I’ve been fooled before by thinking it would be a short meeting. The orchids are immersed, the bathroom and kitchen are clean and it’s only 6:30! The afternoon will be garden time.

Day 121

Meaningful conversations yesterday, first at church and then with Megan. She has powerful insights on her visit with her parents in Reedsport. Linda Lee shared her work at her academy that was challenging and contemporary. Up early and ready for a Monday that has no agenda. I need an R&R day with my house ,yard and myself to take care of. I need to get on the mat first thing and work the core muscles. It’s the best way for me to start.

Dday 120

I’m energetic this morning after a low yesterday.  Short agenda ,  church and a meeting with Deacon Linda for her progress report. The rest of the day is open and I’m hoping to walk and enjoy garden tending. I picked baby greens for a salad and there are lots more so the rows can thin out. The beets and kale are thick. Already have plans for using the greenhouse next season. Simple pleasures soothe my soul from the outside bombardment of bad news.

Day 119

The visitors’ center was busy. I was able to share stories that I have from writing the history column for years. It’s fun to add to information that the tourists want about where to go and what to see. The prayer vigil was well attended. I read Bishop Curry’s words and that was touching. The service was partly in Spanish plus Yurok language. The Methodists and Universal Heart Center people also spoke. Today I’ll be in the Dem booth at the farmers’ market.

Day 118

Yesterday was one of my favorite kinds as it had parts: household chores and shopping, political action, lunch with Megan, watering and weeding, socializing and stories with Carol and Delia, and the Giants won their game! Today I will assist tourists at the visitors’ center and attend a prayer vigil for the refugee children at St. Paul’s. I can’t deal with what’s happening in my country but I can participate in my neighborhood, keep busy with positive people, and take care of myself.

Day 117

Fifteen hours and five minutes of daylight but no sun. The sky is blanketed with fog again. There is enough radiation for the garden to grow but not much warmth. Today is for errands and shopping early. The car will get its weekly exercise as I  consider why I have a car. I do like the occasional convenience like going to the dog spa but most of my life is on foot. Delia and I are going to Carols’ for our story time.

Day 116

Lots to learn and I’m willing. The Cof C center was busy with a constant stream of visitors from all over the country. I like the travel stories. I messed up the POS once and Michelle fixed it. Next time I’ll do better. Then a haircut and picking up a recall petition for Gitlin. I’ll get a few signatures before I turn it back to Billie. Today is museum duty. It has been quiet there and I hope for a busy, interesting  day.

Day 115

Yesterday was busy with people and conversations that needed resources. I had help for them with religion, politics, family, and personal problems. Feels good to be asked and feels even better to have the resources. Weeded. watered, visited, walked. Good day. Today I’ll go to the CofC to talk to tourists. I’m looking forward to being there. I enjoy living here and like to share information. Still have the restless feeling that I’m missing some big clue about the purpose of my life..

Day 114

Monday again. Still feeling relief that I’m not going to the senior center. After a vigorous Saturday, I was tired and not energetic yesterday. After church, I just relaxed except for a brief walk. I’m seeing a pattern of active days followed by an R&R day. Today I’ll watch my vegetables grow, pull weeds and catch up on fitbit steps. Chuck and Hollie leave for Portland and his surgery plus family reunion. Megan will join them for the weekend so I’ll dog sit.

Day 113

Day 113

The singing bowls stir my brain in a good way. Between the wind and the bowls, I should not have any rust or dust on my synapses. Today I will go to Morning Prayer because  Deacon Linda will lead for her first time. The rest of the day is open. The garden will require attention and I will walk. I’d like something new to spontaneously occur. Yesterday I watched the new Jesus Christ Superstar. It was wonderful with its music, talent, and choreography.

Day 112

Two nights with dreams of being uncomfortable in the bathroom. Both dreams had people who would not leave so I could use the toilet. Interesting. What would I like to get rid of and am not doing so? Meanwhile the days are routine and comfortable. Walking in the wind feels good as if it is blowing the rust off my brain. Besides enjoying watching things grow, I have not had much activity and I wonder what I really want to do. Self-questioning time.

Day 111

The porch railings have  new paint . Looks better. Took the broom to spider webs and cleaned the mail box too. Mainly I watched things grow in the greenhouse, the beans reach the poles, and the peas beginning their climb. I’m enjoying the garden. While the dogs are at the spa for hair and nails, I will shop for groceries. Need to get out early during tourist season. The wind is strong and makes walking energetic. Want deep thoughts to stir my spirit.

Day 110

Museum duty was quiet. Only a few visitors to break up the time. Conversations are interesting with us volunteers too. Max and I talk gardens, gophers, camping, and fossils. Today is housework, yardwork, and simple diversions like walking and chance socializing. I wish I had stories to write. I know my history is full of anecdotes and insights but they are stuck in there somewhere. Where have my words gone? If I was still writing to a theme would I generate a column?

Day 109

The BOS went past four hours and had interesting and contentious moments. I learn a lot about the county’s business and the supervisors’ behavior. The news of the recall made Gitlin even more of a bully and Berkowitz more of an attention grabber. Our harbor initiative will be on the November ballot. Then a brisk walk to Subway for a vegetable sandwich without sauce and a quiet afternoon. These long sitting spells are not good for me. I have to stretch and walk.

Day 108

The Democratic committee meeting was three hours long! I feel stuffed full of information and know I have a lot to learn to be useful to the group and the community. Today is the board of Supervisors meeting and many committee members will be there to support the harbor initiative. The recall of the two obstructers will also be evident as will our two election winners. Lots of watering and weeding are needed right here in my garden. It’s a metaphor for life.

Day 107

I enjoyed the church service and the chatty coffee hour. Went home for 45 minutes and then back for the meeting. Karen had piles of old, 1939 to 1957, copies of Life magazine. We browsed and shared articles. Another friendly group plus food. Besides a Dem committee later, no agenda. I always have yard and garden chores that I enjoy. I get to say wow about how everything is growing. Pickable produce already. Simple pleasures make it fun to get out of bed.

Day 106

Many walks and naps yesterday and I dropped the burdens that aren’t mine to carry. I know that  I am human and a mother. It is in my rule to put family close to the top of the priority list and I do know when to back off. Today my little Episcopal band will attend the service at the Methodist Church. I’ve been curious about their pastor, a young millennial woman who preaches social justice. Later I’ll attend the Historical Society general meeting.

Day 105

The rain feels good. Maybe the lawn will stay green for another week. Karen worked on my shoulders for a long time as I felt that I’m carrying Hollie on my back. I worry about her and there is nothing I can do to lighten her situation. A mean sick husband is outside of my bag of tricks. I keep reminding myself that she has chosen to live like she is living. We all choose. Every day we choose again. I choose peace.

Day 104

The stories bring stories. Yesterday we went from collecting rocks, voting experiences, neighborhood descriptives, poetry, dogs and cats, and aging. The beans are up and I put the pole teepee in place for them. First peas appeared and reaching for the net.  I was late getting started and the vegetables are growing fast. Lots going on in the greenhouse but I must pause for a massage. It is an important part of self-care. Karen is holistic and intuitive about what my body needs.

Day 103

Fun with Rosalie and Karen at Seaquake. We talked for two hours while having a meal and a pint of blonde ale. I enjoy them and our conversations go all over the place. Rosalie is co-authoring a book on aging using the hero’s journey as a theme. Lots of garden talk and plans. Today I’ll get errands done early as the tourists are already in town. Later my story people will come to share and respond. First the routine exercise and good nutrition.

My interest in elder circles started on July 4, 2016 at Hollie’s house when she had a barbecue party for Laurie, Rod, and Dona. They came from Idaho to complete a real estate deal for Dona’s house. Laurie and Hollie have been friends from the seventh grade and so I have known Dona that long. In 2010 Laurie asked Dona to come live with her and Rod and I helped her sort and delete her house full of stuff. The move was good. Rod was wonderful with her and built her a greenhouse, made a garden spot and folded her into their lives. It worked for a few years until Dona began to decline. By the time they come to Hollie’s party, they had a way of “parking” Dona in a chair and giving her glasses of wine. The next day Dona came to spend the afternoon with me as they did the legal work. She cried and told me how they took her along on their trips and “parked” her somewhere so she didn’t bother them.

Then I met Terra Bella from the Moon Tribe who said she was interested in elder circles and we talked about what that would look like. I made research trips to google and didn’t find a lot of help in how to get started until I found Noetic science institute that offered a course in Conscious Aging. Move ahead a couple of weeks to the day that Karen asked me to go to Klamath with her and Rosalie to stand with the Yurok tribe to support the Standing Rock tribe. On the way home I said who would be interested in elder circles and Rosalie said “Let’s do it.” I ordered the books from IONS and she did too. Together we put together our own version of the program as we didn’t like theirs. We started a group at the senior center that worked very well. Lots of time passed due to life and now we are prepared to begin another group with changes that we made from the previous experience. Rosalie has lots of facilitator experience and is the lead in our partnership. She is currently co-authoring a book on aging. Soon we hope to get another chance to share our program. 

Day 102

The election went to our candidates keeping sanity and reason on the Board of Supervisors. The dirty tricks didn’t fool the people. I enjoyed the visit to the Chamber of Commerce visitors’ center. It was as though I never left! Sarah has done a great job of  sweeping out old stuff and making it strictly local. I will volunteer there and fit in. Today is museum duty. Afterward I will go to the farmers’ market and maybe pick up lunch from a vendor.

Day 101

Changing the way I spend time takes a while. Although I didn’t miss going to the senior center, I was aware that it was Monday with a sense of playing hooky. After the routine, I am going to the Chamber of Commerce to meet with Sarah about volunteering there. I did that a long time ago and enjoyed the visitors. Yesterday I walked with Carol. She is doing well by herself. We chatted about life and time and the neighborhood. Everything is growing.

Day 100

Quick assessment of the year so far: passed lots of cardiac tests, good blood test numbers, gained a new greenhouse and filled it with green stuff, lots of walking, ended a twelve year volunteer duty at the senior center with relief, feel satisfied and comfortable about how my life is unfolding. Today is work day at church and I will join for a while after I take my ballot to the clerk, walk bills to the post office, and get a few groceries.

Day 99

Church with Mother Leslie followed by more watering, weeding and enjoying dirt. Yesterday I gave Megan my lovely collection of earrings that I no longer wear. I stopped changing earrings when I stopped using make-up and dressing up for whatever I was involved with. Now I’m in jeans and shirts. I don’t even own any dress up clothes as I gave away all the good pants, tops, and blazers. Simply clean, comfortable, casual wear. I am systematically cleaning out all excess stuff.

Day 98

First Saturday Farmer’s Market. Hollie is coming and maybe Megan too. I look forward to this time together and the busy atmosphere there. It’s often a social occasion too with lots of hugs and quick catch up conversations. As I worked in the yard yesterday, I thought about my long history at the senior center and I know how much I contributed there. I am leaving without regret. Sarah wants me to come to the Chamber of Commerce. I’ll visit there on Tuesday

Day 97

I quit altogether. Not for a month but permanently. Felt relief. It’s wise to know when to leave a situation before I blow up and tell how I really feel. There are a few people I will miss. Now I’ll use that time for my garden for now and maybe look for a place in the fall. I want to be busy in the dark months. Today is for errands and shopping. I need a garden hose that doesn’t spray from several holes.